Letter to My Parents

Dear mom and dad,

How are you guys doing? We haven't really talked much, that's probably because I've been out a lot. I don't know why I go out. I just don't like staying in. I'm sorry that it messes with family time, considering it's been a huge part of our family. I just feel trapped when I'm home. I get this uncomfortable feeling. I feel like I'm suffocating. Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with you guys and the girls,  but I think I'm at that age where I need to spread my wings. I need to have some independence. And I know that you guys know that because whenever I ask to go out you guys say yes. I love that about you guys, but I just feel bad for leaving you guys behind; especially my sisters. I feel like I have a responsibility that I have to take care of as the oldest child. I feel like I have to be there at all times. It's weird. I want to grow up, but at the same time I wish I wouldn't. I don't know. It's tough. But even through all of this, you guys are always there no matter what. Thank you so much. You guys are very understanding parents and I love you guys.

Your loving son,
Erick Gonzalez.

Frankl-y Speaking

Victor Frankl said that the reason why men live isn't for power or pleasure, but rather meaning. Men unconsciously strive for a meaning to life. They have gone so far as to say that their true meaning is to pleasure oneself or have total control of power, which if one was to really think about it is quite ridiculous. I guess I can't complain because I feel like the two psychologists who came up with the power and pleasure principles were on to something. Every man likes to pleasure himself (not that way), but after a while they begin to care for others and pleasure them more. For example, once a man or woman has children, their priority is to pleasure their children, which in return pleasures them to know that their children are getting all that they can get. In a way it's a circle of pleasure. Anyways, whether it be power through success or strength, men also seek power, but not through out their whole life. I believe this kicks in around adolescence through around the time (if a man has kids) that children leave. If they have no kids, then it would end around the time that they have realized that power isn't everything, which will eventually happen. After this phase leaves, then they realize that the meaning to life is actually having meaning alone. People begin to think about what they think about and why and even how are they even thinking. For example, they will begin asking questions that many people will not have the answer to.

After reading 'Man's Search for Meaning' and learning about psychology and philosophy, I have rounded up most of the beliefs. I believe that all of these men who created these theories were correct, but they weren't quite their. I believe that they merely had a slice of what life is all about. I believe that all of these theories are played out through a person's life. Every person will encounter pleasure; just as every person will want to strive for greatness and power; just as every person will question their existence in life. Frankl proposed that there are many meanings to life, so I guess I can agree that he was the closest one who truly understood what it was to do in life and it's pretty much to enjoy it while it lasts. Enjoy all the good, and all the bad, things that will happen through your life.

Meaning of Life

John Lennon said, "When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life."

When I first heard this quote by John Lennon I was touched. I like going on the internet and reading what famous people said. Anyways, this helped me fully understand on the thought process in Lennon's mind; like he was only five years old and he had a basic, yet powerful understanding of life. Being happy is different than being content. Being content, to me, is tolerating something and if you have to tolerate anything then you aren't happy. Being happy, to me, is hard to explain. To be happy is being happy, you know? Life is happiness. Life is hard to explain, thus making happiness equally as hard to explain.

The meaning of life, to me, is... well, I have no idea. I would really have to think about it. I know happiness plays a key role to the meaning of life, but I also know that there is more to it. Now that I think about it, many people nowadays say things like "Oh blah and blah is life," referring to 'life' as a sense of whole and completeness. Like saying 'blah and blah' is a good thing. At least that's what I think. But um now that I had the time to really had the chance to think it through, I came up with this: Life is being happy. Life is being sad. Life is anything you want it to be. 

Thankful for Classmate

Where to start... I am thankful for Sarah Sanchez. I met Sarah in October of Freshmen year. I had overheard her talking about a class that I was taking and finally found my chance to stir up conversation with her. I wasn't too keen on talking to girls back then so school usually helped me out. We began talking more and one thing led to another and now we're inseparable.

I'm thankful that she continued talking to me because she always seemed to push me, whether it be studying to get good grades or helping me make friends, Sarah seemed to have a skill that I never had: being social. I used to be a 'keep-to-myself' kind of guy and Sarah changed that. Sarah was also filled with persistence. She never gave up. She struggled in math and I would offer to tutor her and she was never hesitant for help. She accepted her obstacles, something I never had the courage to do. I would help her with that and she would continue on. She aced all of her classes and continues to do so.

I'm thankful because she is a great friend who is always there for me. I know that we might part and go our different ways, but I plan to keep in touch with her. Anyways, thank you Sarah. Thank you for everything.

Alone

In the movie, "Into the Wild,"  it was Chris's intentions to get away, to go and be alone. In the book,  "Siddhartha,"  Siddhartha seeked for experiences and he wanted to do it alone.

I like to be alone, but not as much as I love to be around people. Sure, there are a lot of people I wouldn't want to be around for a long period of time, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't mind them being around. Like, I like to think I'm a pretty cool and chill person, so I'm bearable to other people; plus I can tolerate others very well.

When I'm alone, I find myself trying to communicate to friends and if they don't reply then I go to my friends that I would barely talk to, you know,  the ones who only talk to you when they need something. Except ironically I'd be needing something: somebody to talk to. Yeah, but they don't know that.

If I choose to be alone and to not talk to people, I turn to music. I listen to all kinds of music and like to spread around different genres. I was a huge fan of the Beatles for a long long time, but I mean who wasn't? Right now I listen to this soundtrack from the movie "Guardians of the Galaxy."  It has a good collection of songs. For example:  "Hooked On A Feeling," "Fell In Love," "Ooh Child," and many more good 80s music. The only song that gets to my nerves is "Cherry Bomb." I can't take the Runaway lead singers signing. I mean honestly,  she was literally just screaming into the microphone. But that was the trend back then I guess.

I guess I can fully say that when I'm alone I begin to think. And not think like 2+2 think,  but think like 'what is life' think. It's a good feeling, especially knowing that I dont have to share my thoughts with other people, except of course the people reading this right now... consider yourself lucky.

Anyways, in the movie, Chris wrote in his journal that happiness is only real or true when it is shared. I hadn't really thought about that except when I saw this. I thought about the times when I was genuinely happy and there were always people around so I'm going to have to agree with Chris's theory. Mainly because I dont like go be alone.

 

What should we have figure out by now?

We should already have batteries that last forever, and they can't be those rechargeable ones. These batteries should last forever.

We should have gotten the idea of peace spread throughout the world already. Peace and war are two topics that nobody really talks about anymore and that is mainly because war tops peace nowadays. I think that if peace overcame war, these two topics wouldn't be much of a big deal anyways.

We should have found a cure for cancer already. There are all of these scientists and doctors looking for a cure and all of these foundations that are asking for money, yet there is no cure. There are only things to slow down the process of cancer.
Along with this idea of cures, HIV and AIDs should be cured already. I mean Magic Johnson got a cure, why can't any ordinary person receive it.

There are many things that we as people still haven't figured out. These are the only things that came to my mind.

Knowledge

How do I know what I know? Where does my knowledge come from? How did my knowledge affect me? When did this knowledge show up? Why did it show up?

The religious beliefs that my parents practiced is the one that was passed down to me: Catholicism. Being raised in Hispanic neighborhoods made me feel like catholicism was the only religion. It was only until I was twelve that I realized there were more religions and that not all people believed in the god that I believed in. I kind of shrugged religion to the side for a while. All of my knowledge went directly towards school, mainly math.

Math became pretty important in my life when I was younger.  I always thought I had a thing with numbers. I played sudoku well and was usually good with cards. Math came easily to me. With this physics was introduced to me. This belief of physics led me to science which is a contradiction to everything that I was raised by. Science questioned religion and now I'm half way in belief. I believe in Catholicism and in science.

My parents also introduced me to moral choices. They taught me how to be respectful, yet know when to stand up for myself. As I get older they still shape my knowledge, although I have been rebellious lately because of friends. So all in all, it was my friends who showed me the knowledge of rebellion. Of course people have never liked being held down anyways, so I guess I thank my friends for showing me this rebellious idea.

Knowledge to me usually comes to me as I mature as a person. New knowledge arises every day. As the saying goes: you learn something new everyday.